I often tell my clients that they need to accept a situation for what it is in order to move forward.
Many people react to the word acceptance and wonder why they should ”like” what has happened to them. But acceptance is not about approving of a situation or believing that what happened is right. It is about seeing the situation as it truly is.
When we can do that, we become clearer in our thinking. We often need to take a step back from our circumstances and the things that are causing us pain, and observe them more neutrally, almost from a bird’s-eye view.
It is difficult to think clearly and find solutions when our emotions completely take over.
One simple way to gain perspective is to imagine yourself as someone else looking at your situation from the outside. If you were that third person, would you see yourself in the same way?
Perhaps you would see different possibilities.
Perhaps you would see that you can make new choices, taking small steps in a different direction.
Perhaps you would recognize that you need support from someone who can see solutions that are difficult for you to see right now.
Many times, self-sabotage comes from trying to cope alone for too long. We hold everything to ourselves, afraid or too proud to ask for help.
There is always help to get.
